When the romantic fantasy movie “Twilight” hit the big screen in 2008, the battle between Team Edward and Team Jacob began, not only on screen, but in the homes of female persuasion everywhere. The romantic souls were drawn to Edward while others lusted after the oh-so-dashing Jacob. As the saga continued and its popularity grew, so did the choices in trinkets and treasures available for purchase bearing the beloved team names and faces. Before you knew it, Twilight merchandise on girls everywhere.
Now, I am all about movies and of course enjoy being on the trendy side of things, however, I was a bit shocked when an acquaintance of mine stopped by the house sporting a Team Edward t-shirt. The shirt proclaimed her love for Edward and had a nice sexy headshot of him sitting across her mommy boobs! Yes, I say mommy boobs because she is a mommy! She is also a wife and in her thirties! Um…yuck!
Why did this disturb me you ask? Am I not about what’s in style you might wonder? Yes, I truly am! But, when my brain computed that she was wearing a t-shirt that proclaimed her lust for a seventeen-year-old movie character, something made me nausea. When I asked her about it, I got an entire education on Team Edward, well, on Edward anyway. If a dad were roaming around town wearing a sexy picture of a teenage girl across his t-shirt proclaiming his lust for her, would he not be considered some kind of pig or child molester? Maybe I thought too far into it, but I think that teen crushes belong to teens, and not flashed across someone’s mommy boobies! Just saying…
When my first baby began to crawl and pull at things, I quickly realized that my long hair needed to go. Time after time the tiny little peanut had all but ripped chunks of it out while nursing, and although I loved it, I knew my long locks had met their match. In high school and college I cut my own hair most of the time, kind of like a hobby. I did my mom’s on several occasions and always colored her hair. So, taking off a few inches while the baby napped seemed easy enough. I grabbed my hair scissors and decided to get busy.
I took about two inches off my hair on both sides and came to a place in which I needed some assistance. I couldn’t seem to get the back straight; regardless of what position I put the mirror in or how I cut it. This is when somewhere in my brain I decided it was a good idea to ask my husband for assistance with my little project. I gave him what seemed like simple instructions to basically cut in a straight line across the back of my head. Somehow, after messing with it for what seemed like eternity, he spun me around to view his handiwork only. It was then that I realized that he literally had bushwhacked my hair!
The back was now a good two inches shorter than the sides, now equivalent with the middle of my earlobe. Bless his heart, as I had no idea how he thought this was a good plan, but my heart began to race as I realized how ridiculous this was destined to look. A quick call to my dear friend was answered by her timely arrival to rectify the situation, however, between everyone’s laughing and crying at the mess, the end result was truly mortifying. By the time she went home my precious long locks were at thing of the past and I was now the proud owner of a pixie cut. Note to self, never let the untrained husband or best friend take a turn with the scissors on your hair!
Of course, as you can see, I have decided to keep this style – it’s “grown” on me LOL
Going to prom was one of the most exciting things to do when I was in high school. I can remember going to the local bridal boutique to pick from their vast array of dresses and hitting the mall for accessories to match. It was truly a joy that I looked forward to experiencing with my own daughter. Imagine my excitement then when my daughter was asked to the senior prom at a local high school. I couldn’t wait to get our shopping on!! Funny thing though, today’s dresses are not only cost twice the money, but come with less fabric!
Three days into our shopping adventure, my daughter and I both were trashed. We had hit the local shops in town only to find dresses ticketed double the price as the ones in the mall. The ones in the mall were so revealing that tape would be required to keep her boobs actually in the dress or they had a back “V” that lead the eyes to places not to be flashed around freely on the dance floor. Overwhelmed and ready to give in, we decided to hit one last store an hour from home. Within minutes of arrival we found a gorgeously designed gown that looked as if it was made for her, however, it was the worst possible color! It was like a dirty brown, or as we called it “the poop dress”.
The sales person confirmed our worst fears, the dress was only available in “poop” color, or we could wait a month for the right color to be delivered. Sadly, we loaded up and headed home feeling defeated. As we entered our neighborhood and were driveway bound, my cell phone rang. It was the sales person from the store. Apparently, they had just received an unexpected shipment of dresses and within it was THE dress, only in watermelon instead of poop! We quickly turned ourselves around and headed back to snatch up a watermelon! As we headed back down the street, my daughter said as serious as can be “I’d much rather be a watermelon than a piece of poop!” Who could blame her!!
There is a saying that proclaims, “great minds think alike”. This couldn’t possibly have been truer than when my childhood best friend and I decided to take our families camping together. The weather was a bit chilly, but not really too terribly cold so I decided to pack just one long sleeve t-shirt and the rest my comfy cotton short sleeved. An unexpected cold front hit the campground one night as we slept and we awoke to a chilly morning. We moms took of to hit the showers, leaving the dads to feed the masses. My friend and I snatched up two different sides of the bathroom to shower and get ready in. Imagine our great surprise to come around the corner and discover that we had on exactly the same outfit!
At the time we lived an hour apart and we rarely had the opportunity to spend time together, hence the camping trip. Neither of us had a clue that the other one had purchased the identical shirt. The sad part was that it was so cold and neither one of us actually brought a second long sleeve shirt! We vowed to stay at the campground that day as to not be spotted in town dressed like bizarre twins, as we already had similar features and almost identical eyeglasses. As it was, the campground host had already asked us when we arrived if we were sisters. Our plan was met with success, well, that is until suppertime when my middle child took a nasty spill on his bicycle that required a trip to the emergency room. Can you guess who had to take him?
The next idea was to paint my nails before I went to bed. I would pop on my pj’s, brush my teeth, and climb into the bed. The result found me sitting on top of the covers patiently waiting for the polish to dry, or even better, waking up with sheet prints on my nails! This too ended up being ridiculous as now my nails had crazy lines all the time or ended up with the polish taken off before breakfast.
My final attempt to git-r-dun was a crazy success, and now that my kids are in their teens, I still do them this way today. First and foremost, quick dry nail polish has been and will forever be my hero! When the kids were small, I would strap everyone into their car seats, climb into the driver’s seat, buckle myself in, leave my door open, and paint my nails right there in the car. After a quick swipe with the polish I would shut the door and my freshly painted nails would be dry by the time we reached our destination! Problem solved!
A moment that arrived in my life when I realized that I had been buried in diapers and sippy cups so long that I didn’t know what was fashionable anymore. I was a busy mom of four toddlers and spent my days shoveling cheerios and corralling the zoo. I really had no time for fashion nor did my tired brain care to think about it. But, there I was, sitting in a mom’s meeting listening to a hair designer talk about what was in and what was out. Now, I have never been a total fashoinista, but I suddenly knew that what I had going on, was definitely O.U.T. out! Somehow while I was busy finding lost pacifiers and finding good deals on diapers, the world have moved on without me. I decided I needed to take action before I became lost in yesterdays style forever. Although mom duty called, I realized that I needed a minute to myself too.
A simple call to a well-known salon in the area began my return to what I would call the “real world”. A new hairstyle was in order! Funny thing was that I came to realize that my husband was stuck back in time as well. I arrived home proudly sporting my new messy styled du only to have him look astonished and say with a chuckle that it looked like I had slept in it! Coming from a guy wearing a 90’s Hydra-Color t-shirt, this didn’t faze me a bit and I returned the chuckle.
By the time the next mom’s meeting had come I was almost like a new person. I had learned to say goodbye to my 80’s black eyeliner, say hello to my newly crazy hair, and even took on a new set of stylish specks to replace my huge round spectacles that were once so cool. Looking back now, I don’t think it was that I felt bad about being out of style. I just didn’t feel good about being in style. As mom’s we get so busy meeting everyone else’s needs that we forget to take time for ourselves, and to embrace our own individual style that doesn’t feel so lost in the everyday “mommy-ness” of our life. The lesson I learned then was that it was okay for me to take a minute and allow myself to be not only the mom I was to be, but also to embrace the woman I was created to be as well.